Rating: 2.5/5
Hooptober 5.0 | 23/32 | Flying Thing that Kills You 2/2
It’s the future, baby. A civilian ship is carrying 40-plus folks in cryostasis, including a convict named Richard B. Riddick. His surgically-altered eyes see in the dark but cannot bear light. He’s also a self-proclaimed “animal,” so cryostasis doesn’t work on him.
Astroids rupture the ship’s hull, killing the captain and sending the ship off-course. The ship crashes into an unknown planet, killing most of the passengers. Riddick escapes into the wilderness.
Bad shit continues to happen. Everyone blames Riddick, but what if it isn’t???
What is this, Lost?
This concept is fine. The movie has a Sy-Fy TV show aesthetic, but I don’t care about cheap effects.
This movie has some light bondage — Riddick is tied up, gagged, and blindfolded. He’s a little freak — when hiding, he cuts off a tuft of a woman’s hair to smell. I get so bored with these kinds of characters — every Vin Diesel character — where they’re flawlessly badass and never experience fear or setbacks.
Every time the plot finds a path forward, everything comes to a halt so we can receive yet another warning about Riddick and yet another speech from Riddick that proves he knows everything about everything.
The world-building is also sloppy. None of the buildings have lights because the three suns never set. But they consistently eclipse one another, creating the pitch black that only Riddick can navigate. They would need lights then, right?
The movie does nothing well enough for me to enjoy it. The film has a fan base — sci-fi fans have survived on table scraps and mediocrity since the genre’s inception. I never found an in that kept me engaged.