Rating: 3/5
An explosion of drums, a beating heart, a man outside in a trench coat and sunglasses — a band recording together in a studio, a fly buzzing in the drummer’s face that he crushes in the high-hat
The pursuit begins — even though we have no idea what the hell is going on — and the drummer Roberto (Michael Brandon) accidentally stabs the man in a trench coat, killing him. Not only that, someone in a child mask photographs the whole event
Tormented by the events, he lays in bed tossing and turning next to his wife, Nina (Mimsy Farmer), who doesn’t seem to care what has happened
But the person who saw it developed the film, and is messing with Roberto, sending him the dead man’s passport and hiding photos of the event in his house
“I could kill you, but I don’t want to,” the masked person whispers, rope wrapped around Roberto’s neck. “Who can you turn to? You’re all alone.”
Well, he turns to a guy named God and a parrot named Jerk Off. Okay, the man’s real name is Godfrey (Bud Spencer), and in addition to his parrot, he has an associate he calls The Professor. How are they going to help? Beats me!
I only included that part because a guy called God is pretty funny. The plot splinters further from here, with the maid trying to blackmail the person in the mask, Nina’s cousin coming to visit, someone being in and out of an asylum, etc.
I just don’t care. I don’t know what I’m supposed to be invested in. The plot twists, and we don’t see how the game changes or why there’s a game in the first place. Even in the end, the killer’s villain monologue is almost entirely unrelated to what we’ve seen up to that point
Looks good, though. Not Suspiria good, but some neat shots. Although, no one ever accused Argento of filming a bad-looking picture (well, not his early movies, at least)
And how it’s solved, as convoluted as it is, is pretty amusing — it involves capturing an image from the retinas of the dead person of what they saw just before they died
Argento completists (and Mimsy Farmer fans) will find something to enjoy
Stray Thoughts
- Sweet kitty falling asleep, I audibly “Aww!”-d
- The PI’s eye-shaped door handle is neat. “Oh, you heterosexuals!” the PI says
- A lot of cat murders :(