Anne Welles leaves New England for New York, leaving behind family and a suitor. She visits Bellamy and Bellows Law Offices to speak with Miss Steinberg about a secretary position at the firm for Mr. Henry Bellamy, a theatrical lawyer. Bellamy isn’t convinced of Anne, so he tests her out by sending her to get signatures from Helen Lawson on some contracts. Little does Anne know that Lawson is a diva.
Once at the rehearsal hall to meet with Lawson, Anne makes the mistake of complimenting the girl singing in the other room, Neely O’Hara, whom Helen believes threatens her success. So, Anne demands that they cut Neely’s number from the show and refuses to sign any contracts for Bellamy until he cuts Neely. Anne isn’t sure she wants the job, so she goes back to Bellamy to report this. Instead, she runs into Bellamy’s partner, Lyon Burke, whose handsomeness convinces Anne to stick around.
Bellamy, Burke, and Anne go down to the rehearsal hall and witness Neely losing her song, and Bellamy trying to get Neely to quit and save them money. Neely’s friend, Jennifer, gives her some support in her dressing room. Burke does some quick thinking and lands Neely a performance for a cystic fibrosis telethon, which ends up being a huge success. They go to Tony Polar’s nightclub to celebrate, where Burke negotiates a nightclub act for Neely.
The film follows Anne, Neely, and Jennifer as they find their respective success, only to have it all come crashing down.
The theme of the movie seems to be, “showbiz is cruel.” Here, it drives promising young women into depression and addiction. The valley is Hollywood, full of promise, and the dolls are barbiturates, filling the space where success ought to be. Like Requiem for a Dream, the film has a cartoonish understanding of addiction and romance, resulting in a movie that leans heavily into melodrama, though it is not as fun.
The music numbers are fine. I don’t really remember any of them. Despite their prominence in the movie, they feel closer to filler content.
I don’t think this movie is as terrible as critics say, and it does have moments that made me chuckle. Barbara Parkins feels like a Kardashian prototype. Sharon Tate has an aura that is hard to separate from her tragic death. Patty Duke’s soap opera delivery of every line is pretty iconic.
Ted Casablancas is not a f*g! And I'm the dame to prove it.
It took me about half the movie to get on its wavelength (that is, the wavelength that sees this as camp). While there are moments of fun, so many scenes in the movie just seem to drift in and out, rote and inconsequential. Still, I’m glad I saw it so that I can appreciate Beyond the Valley of the Dolls in comparison.